Self-confidence – A Skill that can be learned



Hi Guys,


I hope that you’ve all had a really great day.


Let’s get going with today’s topic regarding self-confidence.


There was this extremely attractive and sexy young lady in an office I once worked in. The single guys kept buzzing around her like bees around a honey pot, but that is where it stopped.


This went on until a new guy joined the company. It did not take long before he figured out that even though there were always guys’ talking to her, no one was actually going out with her. He had the self confidence and the self assuredness to ask her out and guess what? She accepted.


You may have noticed that I talk a lot about self confidence. This is because self-confidence is one of the crucial elements in achieving success, not only with women but also in life in general.

Funnily enough, it is a skill that can be learned. As I’ve said previously you can fake it until you make it. Faking confidence is similar to practicing confidence. It’s like a pilot practicing a flight in a simulator. Faking confidence is a simulation of the real thing. And the more you practice the better you get until it becomes a part of you.

The problem is that if you have been told that you are worthless all your life it becomes a part of you. It’s like subroutine that’s been added to your core program and even though it is difficult to reprogram yourself it can be done. To stay with the software analogy, it is a case of overwriting the subroutine with new and better code.

Before you can get the women you really want in your life you must believe in yourself, you have to believe in your own self-worth. Because if you don’t believe in yourself, how can you get others to believe in you. Remember you are selling a package to the world and that package is you.

The problem as I see it is without believing in yourself and without self confidence you are going to miss out, not only with the ladies but in life as well.

There are thousands of guys out there who are not nearly as talented, intelligent or good-looking as you and yet they’ve succeeded in attracting and seducing the woman of their dreams. And the only difference between THEM and YOU is that they have done something right, or enough of something right, in order to succeed.

Instant gratification and overnight success does not exist in our world. You’ve got to work at to achieve your goals. By being prepared you create your own luck.

Rejection ain’t no big a deal if you practice detachment.  Normally its our ego that gets in the way, blowing things out of proportion.

There will be milestones when a woman initially rejects you and then changes her mind later on, (Unfortunately for her you may have move on by then) or when you get rejected by a woman only to go on and have great success in your very next attempt with an even better looking woman. These milestone reinforce the fact that rejection is no big deal.

So take on board what you’ve learned and redouble your efforts. Go out there and practice improving your skills. And for Pete’s sake do it with a smile on your face.


You must realize that not only CAN YOU go after your dreams – but you can actually REALIZE THEM!!!


I would really appreciate your comment on the above.



As always, I wish you everything I wish myself.

Until the next time.

Alain


Until the next time.


Alain

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Feed Shark

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Fear and the problem with thinking too much

Seduction Secrets For Men


Hi guys,

Today we will approach one of the things that may be hindering you in approaching and seducing beautiful and attractive women – Fear.

Fear is part of our core program. It is helpful for survival by warning us of potential danger. It pumps up your adrenalin and mentally prepares you for to deal with the problem.

The problem lies when we allow fear to breed in our mind, which in turn inhibits our ability to take action.

Fear is all about thoughts. How you think about something determines how you feel about it and whether it is scary or not.

I’m sure that some of you will be able to relate with me

When I have to start something new, something I have never carried out before, I procrastinate, I let my fear overwhelm me and I imagine that I will not be able to do what I have to do. That is because I have to break my personal comfort zone.

And then, once I have done what I have done what I needed to do, I find that it was a lot easier than what I thought.

The same thing occurs when you approach a woman for the first time. You are breaking your personal comfort zone and entering an unknown territory and you fear rejection. Suddenly your brain switches into high gear and starts churning out images of you stuttering, tripping and falling. You see her laughing at you and not with you and you feel the blood drain from your head, you feel butterflies in your stomach and your palms start to sweat.

Fear is conquering you.

But will those things you fear actually happen.

An accumulation of negative thoughts flows into your mind causing the fear to snowball into a huge issue. And the funny thing about fear is that the vast majority of the things we fear and worry about don’t come true. This means that all the time spent worrying and fearing something that is most probably not going to happen is actually wasted.

The word fear can be deciphered as False Evidence Appearing Real.

When those negative images start appearing in your mind… STOP! Control your thoughts and visualise a positive outcome. See her smiling at you, responding positively to you and dancing with you. I am sure that you can fill your own positive thoughts for any scenario you come across.

Too much thinking and inaction allows fear to breed in your mind. Action is the Key to your salvation. Therefore, whenever you want to do something that is outside your comfort zone, don’t let fear have time to breed, just do it. Act upon it, look fear in the face and do the things you think you cannot do. Actions are the seeds to your success.

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”

– Dale Carnegie

You will learn from the experience and be able to deal with that fear the next time with more confidence and strength. Doing the things you fear, conquers that fear and turns it into part of your comfort zone.

I would really like you to comment if you have any thoughts on the above.

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Until the next time.

Alain

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